Abandonment Issues

I have sad news, friends.

Smith is leaving. He has to transfer out of state for work, and that means that he and his adorable wife (also my dear friend) and his darling baby (also known as my future daughter-in-law) have to pack up and move. This is the nature of his job; it takes him everywhere. I knew this when we became friends, but I sort of tucked it away in the back of my mind, the possibility that he might have to go somewhere, someday.

I'm having a really hard time writing about this today. Maybe it's my Easter candy hangover, maybe it's hormones, maybe it's the fact that I just went back and re-read pretty much my whole blog. I don't know. We haven't been working out together regularly for a while -- with two jobs for me and ridiculous job demands for him, there hasn't really been time. But he's become one of my best friends, and I'm going to miss him.

I know that just because he's not going to be here in Virginia anymore doesn't mean he can't help me, or that he can't be my friend anymore. We're all grown ups, we have cell phones and Facebook pages and (yes, it still exists) snail mail. It just means he won't be HERE. So today I'm sad, and it's hard. It's hard because I'm thinking about how much Smith has helped me, not just with working out and weight loss but with my whole life. He helped me get motivated to get my massage certification done, to take better care of myself, to be a better person.

I don't want him to leave. I don't want his wife to leave. They are both so much a part of my life that I don't remember what it was like before we were friends (funny how that happens, isn't it?).

So today is hard, and there are tears. There's still weeks to go before the big move, plenty of time to be spent together, plenty of Taco Nights and beers on the back porch and haircuts and merciless teasing. Plenty of time, but not nearly enough.