e.e. cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

my heart)i am never without it(anywhere

i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done

by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear

no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want

no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

184

Not much to say this week. Some big changes are coming, and when I'm ready, I'll share. Until then, just be patient with me, m'kay?

184.4

I wasn't too excited about my weight this morning until I looked at last week's post. I lost two pounds! Whoa. Kind of surprising because I've been slacking on both my workouts and my food tracking. But I've also realized that I'm kind of on auto-pilot with the food part. Without thinking too hard about it, I'm staying at/under/very close to my daily calorie goal. What a relief that is. It can be really exhausting to record every tiny piece of food that crosses my lips.

Well, that's it for me. How was YOUR week?

186.4 & Hanging In There

Quite frankly, I'm astounded to have lost anything this week. My stress level was through the roof, and as a result I let my eating get out of control.

The biggest stressor -- losing my phone -- has been eliminated. While I didn't recover my old phone, my mom saved the day with an early anniversary/Mother's Day gift: a new iPhone 4. And thanks to some software magic, all but about a week's worth of my pictures were restored.

I also got an interesting phone call from a friend who needed some guidance. I have to say, it's kind of a new experience to have anyone ask me for help with a weight-related issue. She asked me how I stayed motivated, how I kept going. It's a simple question, but not a simple answer. As usual, I rambled and babbled, but hopefully gave her some of what she was looking for. Now that I've had a few days to ponder, I think I can reduce my babbles into a few more concise points.

So how do I do it? How do I stay motivated? Here's what works for me:

Accept the fact that sometimes, it's going to suck. Like, REALLY suck.
Losing weight, or getting in shape, or whatever it is you're trying to do? It's hard, friend. Some days are harder than others. So when it's hard, when what you really want to do is quit, just accept that it sucks. Get upset, get mad, cry, whatever. BUT DON'T STOP! Don't quit. Keep pushing through, and I promise, when you do, you'll look back at that suckage and think one of two things: a) it wasn't really so terrible, or b) DAMN, that sucked, but how kick-ass am I that I got through it?

Get it out in the open, ask for help, and accept help when it's offered.
No matter how strong we are, none of us can do this alone. And if you try to do it alone (like I did for a very long time), you'll most likely talk yourself out of the things you need to do most. Take it public, friends. Tell somebody, start a blog, post it on Facebook, whatever. You have to let the people in your life (or even just your virtual life) know what you're doing if you want their support. And believe me, YOU WANT THEIR SUPPORT. I couldn't do what I do every day if it weren't for my friends and my family. You'd be surprised how much a little love on your Facebook page can do for you, particularly on a down day. And when people try to help you, LET THEM. Don't let your pride get in the way, and don't live in fear of what they might think "if they knew." I'm going to let you in on a little secret -- the people in your life? They know you have a weight problem. It helped me tremendously to sort of "out myself" as a fat person, a closet eater, and someone who desperately needed to change. Once it's out there, it's a relief. Trust me.

Focus on the big picture.
These things take time. And there will be speed bumps, roadblocks, and traffic jams (bear with me, I ran out of transportation metaphors) along the way. My weight fluctuates from week to week, sometimes up and sometimes down, but when I look at the trend over the last six months or more, the overall trend is down. That keeps me going. It helps me to survive the minor setbacks, like gaining a pound after a week of being off plan. Don't be discouraged. Focus on your long-term goal, and look at the big picture. A narrow view does nothing for me except set off a cycle of obsessive, unproductive thought.

Do it for the right reasons.
In some ways, weight and my relationship with food is similar to addiction to alcohol or drugs. When people give up those substances, one of the things they're usually told during the recovery process is to do it for the right reasons. Giving up booze so your wife won't leave you? That doesn't work. So losing weight or changing your relationship with food so that someone will love you or be proud of you isn't going to work either. For your kids, for your family, to blow people away at your 20th high school reunion...those things can be good motivators in the short-term, but for the long haul, it has to be about you and only you. There is only one reason to do this: YOU.

Stop being so hard on yourself.
You have to let go of the cycle of self-abuse. Beating yourself up over poor choices (or even just less-than-perfect choices) does nothing but diminish your self-esteem. Having less self-esteem makes it easier to be even harder on yourself. And so it goes, on and on. You have to let go of it. I remember one of my favorite teachers of all time, Ms. Alley, telling me during orchestra rehearsals that if I was going to make a mistake (in this case, during a difficult section of some musical piece), make a really BIG one, and get over it. Because once you make that big mistake, it's out there, and it can't get any worse than that. You figure out what you did wrong, and you do better next time. Whether Bach or brownies, it makes no difference. Learn from your mistakes, maybe take some time to figure out why you made that choice in the first place, and then let it go. Move on.

It's transformation, not change. And it doesn't happen overnight.
We're bombarded with articles, infomercials, and TV shows that try to make us believe we can magically fix our weight problems with a special diet, a new gadget, or a stay on some ranch where we can work out with a celebrity trainer for six hours a day. They might call it reality TV, but it's not reality by any stretch of the imagination. The cold hard fact is that significant weight loss takes time, sometimes longer than you ever thought it would take. While it's possible to lose weight quickly, it's neither healthy nor likely to give you long-term success. I've lost 35 pounds in a month before by working my ass off and eating a truly frightening diet. That weight stayed off for maybe three months, and then it came back with a vengeance. And when it did, I felt awful. I felt like I had failed to change. Now I understand that this isn't a change, it's a transformation. I'm not suddenly changing into a different person; I'm learning and growing and transforming. Think about the caterpillar/butterfly scenario. The caterpillar doesn't just wake up one day and say, "Hey! I'm going to be a butterfly today," strap on some wings and fly away. Not at all. He has to prepare; he eats, he finds a good spot for his cocoon. Then he gets all snuggly and over a period of time, he becomes a better, more evolved version of himself. I don't know about you, but I don't want to be someone different; I want to be a better version of myself.

As always, this is what works for me. It may or may not work for you, or resonate with you. I can only hope that you can take something from this, maybe one little thought that helps you get through your day. Thanks for reading -- knowing I'm actually writing for real people and not just the black void of the internet helps me more than you know.

186.6 & First World Problems

It's been an overwhelming few days -- lost cash, missed hair appointment due to sick Kid, and worst of all, lost iPhone. My beloved iPhone! You know, the one with 1,000 pictures of my child? It's gone, gone forever. I lost it at a bar while I was out with friends from work on Tuesday night.

Anyhoo, I was so upset about losing the phone that I didn't eat much yesterday. Still, I didn't have high expectations for my weigh-in today. We've gone out to eat a few times, I drank twice, and I haven't been working out. Imagine my surprise when I stepped on and saw the number.

I'm shaking off the bad juju of the week and starting over. I had a great talk with Smith yesterday (yes! Smith lives!) and another friend of mine is selling me his old iPhone to get me through until I can afford the iPhone 4. My precious pictures are gone forever, but I've learned my lesson -- always download, and always install the "Find My iPhone" software.

How's YOUR week been? What challenges are you overcoming this week?

Another New Adventure

A little over ten years ago, I was creeping my way towards an Associate's degree in photography. I loved all of my art classes, dreaded general ed, and overall had a pretty good time. Two years in, though, I packed up and moved to D.C. without any plans to transfer or finish the degree. It's lurked in the back of my mind since then, that unfinished degree. Yet another project that I started but left incomplete (kind of like how I waited three years to take my NCE).

I've been thinking about school off and on for at least a year. I wasted some time (and money!) going to nail school in the hopes that it would satisfy my "back to school" urge. Of course, it didn't. I pore over anatomy books and pathology books and journal articles under the guise of making myself a better massage therapist. But it's just not enough. I need more. And I need that lingering unfinished business to be done. So I finally bit the bullet; I drove down to the old community college and got a copy of my transcripts -- just to see where I left off.

In my memory, I was a good student. I remember going to classes, getting along with instructors, doing projects, the works. But one look at my transcripts and other memories come back: long nights of drinking at O'Sullivan's, failing tests because of hangovers, looks of disappointment from teachers who really, really liked me and wanted me to excel. With a few exceptions (Biology, Spanish, and Math, surprisingly), my grades were TERRIBLE. I was at school for two years and I'm left with about four classes that will count towards my new degree path. Oy.

So what IS that new degree path? Well, certainly not photography (although if I went back to that, I'd have a whole lot less work to do). I love photography; it's still my hobby. But it's a useless degree at this point in my life, and I don't want photography to be my job. What DO I want, what do I really want, and honestly what HAVE I wanted since I was a kid?

I want to be a doctor.

Saying that out loud, even typing it is scary. It's a scary secret that I've harbored for a very long time. How many times did I tell people I wanted to be a painter, a writer, a massage therapist, a photographer -- anything BUT a doctor. How long have I lied to myself about what I really want? My whole life, it feels like. I kept it a secret because I didn't believe I was smart enough to pull it off. I kept it a secret because deep down I was scared that I WAS smart enough, and oh God, what if I was smart enough and I wasted all those years in high school smoking pot and watching surf movies and riding around in Jeeps and doing anything BUT going to school?! It's a horrible catch-22 of self-defeating thoughts, low self-esteem, regret, and sheer terror.

Time to snap out of it, now. NOW, with the urgency and intensity Cher in "Moonstruck" slapping Nicholas Cage. I believe it of my body -- my body can do anything I want it to. So why not believe it of my brain? Of my life?

I'm aware that the road I'm choosing is long, arduous, and marked with heavy tolls. I'm aware that to get those two magical letters, MD, requires about seventeen years of school and more debt than I can even imagine. I'm aware that it's entirely possible I'll get back into college classes and absolutely hate it. I'm going into this with my eyes wide open. But, dammit, I'm going.

I have to do this. It's as essential to me as my weight loss has been. I cannot live the rest of my life without at least trying to reach this goal.

I'm really going to do this. I have butterflies in my stomach as I browse the catalogs, track degree paths, compare schools. I imagine myself acing insanely difficult classes like Organic Chemistry and feel that indescribable "SQUEEEEEE!" (Don't judge -- Whitman had his yawp, I've got my squee.)

In about five days, I'm registering for classes. I'm taking the first teetering, toddling steps towards a huge, long-term goal. I'm doing this.

Are you ready?

187

My weigh-ins have been irregular, and my weight has followed suit. Up to 189, down to 186. Up to 188, down to 187.6. I'm on a bit of a plateau, I think. To shake things up, I've started paying more attention to my carb/protein/fat ratio (shifting the emphasis to lean protein). And I've upped my water intake again.

I also figured out that work is not as much work as it was before, so I'm not burning as many calories as I thought. I work as a massage therapist, and while it's still physically demanding, my body has adjusted to it like any other exercise. So I can't give myself "extra" calories to eat on days that I work. I simply have to manage my consumption better to keep from getting insanely hungry after two massages.

In other news, I fit into my size 12 jeans yesterday. I was excited, but all of the extra skin on my abdomen (aka THE FLAP) makes them look not so hot. This big band of extra skin just hangs down, and when it's stuffed into my pants it borders on a "butt in the front." I'm going to try and be brave and post some belly pictures so y'all can see what I'm talking about. Or would that be gross? We'll see...

My Workout Routine, Part 1: Weights & The Monster

DISCLAIMER: I am not a personal trainer or physician. The workouts I do were developed by experienced trainers and other people far more knowledgeable than me, and I have also spent a lot of time tweaking them to fit my personality, ability, and schedule. Just because they work for me, does not mean they'll work for you. It's your responsibility to consult with a physician before you begin ANY workout routine. This post is for informational purposes ONLY -- read and/or participate at your own risk!

I tweet pretty regularly about my workouts, and after referring to "The Monster" a few times, folks have been asking me what my exercise routine involves. And because I like to give people what they want, I'll spend the next few blog posts talking about what exactly I do in my little gym.

The simplest explanation I can give is that I work out six days a week, with one day of complete rest. Now, I don't do the Monster all six days; I think that might kill me, and honestly even I don't have that much free time. I try to keep things a simple as possible, so rather than have a schedule where I do certain things on certain days (i.e. legs on Wednesdays, back and shoulders on Thursdays), I do the workouts in a certain sequence. Abs (aka "The 400," more on that in my abs post) and cardio are non-negotiable, meaning they get done on all six workout days. However, if I don't do weight training, my cardio session is doubled.

I realized as I was writing this that breaking down all three components (weight training, cardio, and abs) in any kind of detail would result in a ridiculously long post. So, today I'll talk to you about weights, and we'll talk cardio and abs another time. M'kay? M'kay.

Here's what my weight training schedule looks like. (Again, remember that in addition to these weight training routines, I do abs and cardio EVERY TIME.)

Day 1 -- No weight training
Day 2 -- Chest & Arms
Day 3 -- Back & Shoulders
Day 4 -- Legs & Bum
Day 5 -- The Monster
Day 6 -- No weight training
Day 7 -- Rest day

I've found that this sequence works really well for me. It leaves me sore, for sure, but not so sore that I can't function, can't work (I'm a massage therapist, so I have to be able to move), or can't drag myself in for another workout. However, this schedule isn't set in stone, and I don't beat myself up if I don't follow it exactly. One of the best ways to fail at exercising is to have a routine with absolutely no flexibility!

As I outlined above, I work different muscle groups on different days and culminate the workout sequence with a day of total body weight training. Unless otherwise noted, I do three sets of 15 reps for each of these exercises. The amount of weight may change from day to day; the weights shown below are my minimums. Some days I up it if I'm feeling particularly diesel, but my rule of thumb is that I have to be able to complete the full 15 reps with good form. If I can't, it's too much weight.

Chest & Arms
Incline dumbbell press, 8 lbs each hand
Incline fly, 8 lbs each hand
Incline bar press, bar only (My bar weighs about 30-40lbs, I'm not exactly sure.)
Flat dumbbell press, 8 lbs each hand
Flat fly, 8 lbs each hand
Bench press, bar only
Hammer curl, 8 lbs (3 x 15 reps each arm)
Tricep pushdown, 20 lbs

Back & Shoulders
Bent-over rows, 8 lbs each hand
Dumbbell curls, 8 lbs (3 x 15 reps each arm)
One-arm rows, 8 lbs (3 x 15 reps each arm)
Lat pull-downs, 25 lbs
Pull-overs, 12 lbs

Legs & Bum
Lunges, no weight (3 x 15 reps each leg)
Reverse lunges, no weight (3 x 15 reps each leg)
Leg extensions, 25 lbs
Donkey kicks*, 12 lbs (3 x 15 reps each leg)
Squats, 20 lbs each hand
Dead lift, bar only (I believe the bar I use weighs 20 lbs.)

*I do these because I hate the leg curl apparatus on my weight bench. And because they make my bum work a little harder. And if you've ever seen me in person, you know that I am in dire need of bum-enhancement.

Each of these routines takes me about 30 minutes to complete. I try to move from exercise to exercise quickly, like circuit training, and I change up the order to keep it interesting. For example, this is how I did legs and bum today: one set of reverse lunges on each leg, one set of regular lunges on each leg, a set of leg extensions, and then a set of donkey kicks. Then I repeated that sequence two more times. It keeps my heart rate up and it makes the time go by faster.

The Monster is all three of the above routines combined (Back & Shoulders + Chest & Arms + Legs & Bum). It takes close to two hours (although I'm getting my time down the more I do it), which is one of the reasons I only do it once a week. Also keep in mind that I worked out for a looooong time (months!) before I ever attempted it. When I finish that workout, I am DONE with a capital D, but I also feel super strong, tough, and ready to tackle anything.

So that's it for weights! Tomorrow we'll talk cardio, and after that, abs. Woop woop!

"Loft"y Goals

Hubs took the day off work today. Our original plan was to spend the day in the yard, cleaning up flower beds, planting, and such. But the weather did not agree with us. It was cold and rainy -- not ideal "let's get outside" weather. So what did we do? We decided to have a day date, and headed to the mall for window shopping and a movie.

At the mall, I pulled Hubs into one of my dream stores...Ann Taylor Loft. (Try not to laugh -- far beneath my tattooed, formerly punk-rock exterior lies a very preppy girl who would happily spend her days in a pencil skirt and a cardigan.) I have never, ever in my adult life been able to try on (let alone purchase) clothes from this store. It's always been out of my size range and my price range. But I love the clothes. They're simple, well made, and just...the kind of clothes I'd like to wear.

We walked around the store, and I pointed out things that I liked. A blouse, a dress, an outfit. It never crossed my mind to try anything on until I saw this jacket. I am an absolute sucker for a trench coat (maybe it's my inner flasher!), and I love dark denim. I saw the price tag ($98! What in the ham sandwich!) and quickly inventoried the rack to see what the largest size was. L. Large. Big sigh. There's no way, I thought. The trench I have at home is a XXL from Old Navy. There's no way a Large from Ann Taylor -- land of the teeny tiny ladies -- would even fit over my monster shoulders! But I decided to pull it off the hanger anyway, just for a laugh. Just to confirm what I already knew, that my big sausage arms and flabby belly wouldn't fit, that I'd end up looking like Chris Farley from that famous scene in "Tommy Boy."


"Fat man in a little coaaaat..."

But lo and behold! That doggone trench FIT. And not super tight, second skin, if I starve for a week and put on some Spanx "fit," I mean it ACTUALLY FIT. I was so excited. I knew we couldn't afford it, and it didn't even upset me that I couldn't have it. And the look on my husband's face...he was so happy for me, so proud of me.

Just knowing that jacket is hanging up in my dream store, and it fits me...that's enough. It's enough to know that my hard work is paying off, that all these years and months of struggling have gotten me so far, that the days when I'll be able to fit into EVERYTHING at Ann Taylor are not far away. It's enough.

187.6

I have so much to do, I can't even think straight. Y'all, I have a lot of pots on the fire right now. So many awesome things are happening! I don't really have time to write at the moment. Gah! I keep promising you details and then leaving you hanging...sorry. Hang just a little longer and I promise it'll be worth the wait!

190

I know I haven't blogged in ages, but so much has been going on. I'll write a longer update this week. Right now I'm just happy to report that my down time after surgery did NOT result in a big weight gain. 190! Woop woop!

Practice Heroically

These words were used as an introduction to an amazing yoga video posted by my favorite instructors, Avery Jones (check out his studio, it's a great place to practice!). It seems a bit morbid at first glance, but it's really resonating with me lately:

"Encouraging Words" by Zen Master Guishan

Some day you will die.

Lying on your sick bed
about to breathe your last,
you will be assailed by every kind of pain.

Your mind will be filled
with fears and anxieties
and you will not know
what to do or where to go.

Only then you will realise that
you have not practiced well.

The skandhas/aggregates
(matter, sensations, conceptions,
impulses and consciousness)
and the four elements in you
will quickly disintegrate,
and your consciousness will be pulled
whereever your ancient,
twisted karma leads it.

Impermanence
does not hesitate

Death
will not wait.
You will not be able
to extend your life
by even a second

How many thousands more times
will you have to pass through
the gates of birth and death.

If these words are challenging
even insulting,
let them be an encouragement
for your change.

Practice
heroically.

Do not accumulate
unnecessary possessions.

Don’t give up.
Still your mind,
end wrong perceptions,
concentrate, and do not run
after the objects of your senses.

Practice diligently.
Be determined not to let your days
and months pass by wastefully.

I keep hearing the same three lines in my head:

Practice heroically.
Don't give up.
Be determined not to let your days and months pass by wastefully.

I can't help but think that these are words to live by.

191

Slowly creeping towards the 180s...whew.

Let's Get Funky

A couple of weeks ago, Smith decided it was time to add something to my diet and exercise routine: a fat-burning supplement. As someone who's struggled with weight for more than two decades, I was really skeptical. However, I do trust Smith, and at this point I'm always willing to try something new. I started taking the stuff per his instructions. Whether or not my "purple crack" is actually melting away fat, I can't say. What I can tell you is that it gives me a lot of energy, makes me sweat even more than usual, and has helped to curb my appetite. Over the last couple of days, though, I've encountered a less than pleasant side-effect.

I STINK.

Now, I know everyone stinks a little in their own special way (pheromones, right?) and thanks to the modern convenience of deodorant/antiperspirant, we rarely notice each other's funk. But I'm not talking about a casual your-Degree's-not-really-cutting-it-today smell. I'm talking about foul, old gym bag, meat-sweat, holy HELL that just PONGS, straight up, STINK.

I pride myself on being one of those people who always smells yummy -- not perfumey, so much, but a faint mix of Gain, soap, and the occasional essential oil. So this stinky business? Not making me really happy right now. Smith's explanation is that I've started burning off older fat that's full of junk (or my favorite word -- TOXINS) and the junk is making its way out of me via my armpits. "That's what you get for eating crap!" he said. Oh so comforting, Smith.

I'm hoping that this stinky phase passes quickly. In the meantime, if you have any coupons for Degree, send 'em my way, okay?

194.2

I won't say it. I won't say, "ONLY a pound this week!" A pound is a solid loss, friends.

Other accomplishments this week:

1. I did my first warm yoga class. And I kicked its ASS.
2. I'm having another awesome week at work, slowly building a steady stream of regular clients.
3. I survived the death of our washing machine without having an epic meltdown. I've stayed on top of the laundry all week, so everyone has enough clean underwear to last until the washer's fixed. And I sucked it up and washed my work uniform in the bathtub.

How's YOUR week been?

195.2

Woo hoo! That's a 4.6lb loss, friends!

Ten Things

I really enjoyed Renée's positive post today, so I decided to do my own. (Well, not so much the week in review, but the Ten Things part.)

10 Things to Look Forward to This Week

1. Hanging out with Rachel tomorrow afternoon (MacArthur, here we come!)
2. Working out!
3. Work. I really do love my job.
4. My birthday! It's Thursday.
5. A manicure and pedicure, thanks to my mom, on Thursday.
6. Like Renée, I only work three days this week.
7. Dinner and a kid-free night on Friday.
8. Sleeping in on Saturday morning.
9. Possibly getting my hair cut (the back is growing out & fast approaching mulletdom).
10. Clothes shopping. Now that I'm in "normal" sizes, I actually enjoy it.

How about you? What are you excited about this week?

The Fall of the Old Regime

Oh, my face. My pale, round, chronically imperfect face. I've spent so much money and so much time trying to get my skin into peak condition. The best it's ever looked was the day I got married:



I had virtually no makeup on in this picture. Eyes and lips of course, but no foundation. Just powder. How did I make that happen? Well, I didn't. My mom did, by sending me to an esthetician every week for six months. What a glorious six months THAT was! I was put on a strict cleansing/toning/moisturizing routine; I used AHA, I exfoliated, the whole nine yards. And it was totally worth it. (Thanks, Mom!)

Since then, I can count on one hand the number of facials I've had. And GOOD facials? Psht. Maybe three? Product-wise, I've tried everything from fancy, overpriced organic stuff to plain ol' antibacterial soap. Nothing really seems to work for long. I end up too oily, too dry; I go from flaky to broken out. Lately, I've started wearing more makeup to hide some of the problems that have developed, and of course that only makes things worse. The cycle goes on, and on, and on.

So what to do? Why, turn to teh Intarwebs, of course! And how perfect is this timing -- one of my favorite bloggers, Linda, just posted about her own skin and how she's trying something new. It's called an oil cleansing routine. I'd actually heard of it before; one of my instructors in massage school had gorgeous skin and swore by her castor oil and face brush. I'll let you follow the links in Linda's blog to find detailed explanations and instructions, but the short version is that you rub good, healthy oil on your face to cleanse it. I gave it a try last night, and I was pleasantly surprised:



You can see my spots, and some redness. What you can't see is my giant pores, which have been driving me bananas. Supposedly, the oil cleansing routine will help reduce their appearance by getting all the goop out of them (sounds delicious, doesn't it?). After cleansing, my skin felt very soft and surprisingly clean. The oil did a good job of removing my makeup, too.

I'm going to try this for a few weeks and see how it goes. Fortunately, I have tons of oils laying about. Last night, I used a product called Aura Glow from a local health food store. It's a blend of peanut oil and a few other oils. If I need to, I'll add some castor oil, but for right now it just feels too heavy. In the morning, I'll be washing my face with nothing but water while I take my shower.

We'll see how it goes. I'm happy to try something new, to do something that doesn't involve soap and chemicals and expense. I'll be posting an update (with pictures!) next week.

199.8

Frustratingly small loss, but a loss nonetheless.

Hair! And Eyebrows.

I woke up this morning in a lousy mood. Hubs and Kid subsequently fled the house, and I can't say I blame them. While they were gone, I decided to tackle an epic workout: a full-body weight circuit and an hour of cardio. It was beyond awesome! I know I'll feel it tomorrow (and even more on Monday) but it changed my whole mood around.

Anyhoo, I'd initially planned to spend the remainder of the day on cleaning and organizing projects, stuff I've been putting off for ages. Instead, it turned into a sort of beauty day for me. I cleaned up my eyebrows, colored my hair, and played with the new make-up I got for Christmas (mmmm, Urban Decay!). I was having so much fun; I even broke out my old clip-in hair extensions. Of course, I had to take goobery self-portraits with my iPhone:



Man, do I miss having long hair! I've decided to grow it out (again). So if I tell any of y'all that I'm getting my hair cut, slap me and direct me back to this blog post. Okay? Okay.

(Oh, and I'd also like to point out that my arm looks totally normal-sized, maybe even thin, in these pictures. I don't know why I think that's so rad, but I do.)