Hurdle

I wrote about this over on my other blog already, but I feel like I need to write here, too. I'm facing a hurdle, again, six months after I cleared the first one. What sucks the most is that it's the same hurdle, and it's one over which I have absolutely no control.

My C-section incision seems to have ruptured a second time, leaving me with another hernia. This one's larger than the first, and as of this morning, it's WAY more painful. I stood up this morning and immediately felt an excruciating, burning pain shoot from the area of the hernia, across my whole incision, down my leg, and up to my ribs. I almost fell over. After staggering around for a few minutes, and calling my doctor's office, I had to get in touch with Hubs and have him come home. He drove me to the doc, who said, "Yep, it's another hernia" and scheduled me for a surgical consult on the 15th. Until then, I'm out of commission. No work, no intense workouts, no heavy lifting.

I'm trying very, very hard not to let this break me. I can still walk, I can still get up and move. I don't have to lay in bed for a month. But DAMMIT...why is this happening AGAIN? I'm so frustrated...and this frustration, I can't run out.